/u/[deleted]'s posts in /r/TwoSentenceComedy

Year:

Only show posts with narrations

My girlfriend told me I have to stop drinking

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“You’ve really got my balls in a vice here, you expect me to talk?”

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I think I must have fallen down the stairs at the frat party last night. NSFW

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i’m not racist

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After all the visual evidence I knew the theory of panspermia was correct NSFW

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you know what high school girls have in common with boys

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She called my penis a centipede,

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A signature quirk of mine is that whenever I see an insect of some sort - regardless of if I'm inside or outside - I become somewhere between a cat with a laser and a kid with bubble wrap, and go full-on ADHD Mode with going well out of my way to step on it and kill it...

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I Vant to rob your bank.

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A man walked into a library and asked the librarian, “Do you have that book for men who have small penises?” NSFW

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Title	Upvotes	Mark as read	Favorited	Rating	Add to a list
My girlfriend told me I have to stop drinking	1
“You’ve really got my balls in a vice here, you expect me to talk?”	1
I think I must have fallen down the stairs at the frat party last night. NSFW	1
i’m not racist	1
After all the visual evidence I knew the theory of panspermia was correct NSFW	1
you know what high school girls have in common with boys	1
She called my penis a centipede,	1
A signature quirk of mine is that whenever I see an insect of some sort - regardless of if I'm inside or outside - I become somewhere between a cat with a laser and a kid with bubble wrap, and go full-on ADHD Mode with going well out of my way to step on it and kill it...	1
I Vant to rob your bank.	1
A man walked into a library and asked the librarian, “Do you have that book for men who have small penises?” NSFW	1